I don't necessarily believe I am a brave person. A risk taker, surely. I've heard many people tell me I am brace for the choices I have made in life - getting married young, separating from my husband to pursue a job in a completely new area, pushing hard to get out of jobs that weren't quite right for me, and whatever else it is I end up doing. Even the small things, like setting up my tripod in crowds to take photos or going out for a beer at a bar alone.
Where as most people fear what might happen, my fear tricks people into believing I am brave. I fear what won't happen - I fear being stuck somewhere, I fear letting something small like a few months apart from my husband hold either of us back from something great. Over the past few years, I have learned a lot about myself, both good and bad, and how to really not let things get in the way of happiness.
1 - Don't spend life apologizing
I'm not saying not to say you're sorry when something has gone wrong, but focusing on your problems isn't the way to be. I always tell the same story about a guy I went to college with giving a presentation in class. Being a product designer, we presented model products as well as graphic boards with more information about our concept. A classmate started by apologizing for his graphic board, stating he gave more time to the product itself. One of the people critiquing the class told him he would have never really paid attention to the board had the guy not brought it up, and that he then downgraded the project because of it. We tend to use apologies as excuses and way to cover things up. It's much easier to admit to something and say 'I don't know' or 'I'll fix it' instead of 'I'm sorry'.
2 - Experience like like a trends forecaster
When I worked in the trends department at an agency in Cincinnati, one of the big 'must do's of the department was to try new things and experiences. I remember reading the intro document on my computer and being inspired because it was true - I couldn't very well forecast trends if I was sitting in by a computer doing the same thing every day. That encouraged me to travel more, try as many new foods as I can, and always try to do something once. You never know!
3 - Being alone is not being lonely
People seem to easily mistake these two things. I was rarely 'lonely' when I lived alone in Pennsylvania. Getting to know yourself, you can keep yourself company. If you are on your own, take advantage! You have the ability to go where you want when you want. It's something you may not always have and is very freeing.
4 - People aren't all that focused on you
People who stare at you taking photos aren't going to really remember it. You're a fleeting moment in many that is fairly insignificant. At most, you become 'the girl in the park wearing heels taking photos', and honestly, it could be a lot worse. Don't worry about the people around you so much - they are much more concerned with themselves. Think about you - you are most likely more concerned with what they are thinking of you then you are even thinking about them!
5 - Comparison is the thief of joy
I first heard this quote from Cassey on Blogilates - and it's true. Reading blogs can be great inspiration - it can also be incredibly tiresome because it's easy to compare to those around you. I see girls my ages with pretty, decorated homes that are very custom, and that gets hard for me. I'm renting, and not in a position to do those things, and can easily get put off by the fact my house isn't as nice. But is it worth it? No, I'm just having first world problems, and I have a lot of nice things I should be incredibly happy about. But comparing my life to someone else's can really steal the joy. Sometimes it's really important to step back and get away from it all.
